I wish I had a piranha, or five

 

Isolation,
is the fucking blue pill; & most people are idiots. The older I become, the more I understand this in so many ways. That sucks too. I will explain that later.
Do you remember Abercrombie and Finch? Of course you do.
My friend was a manager there and got me a job interview. I was thankful because I needed a job. I was 18. I had a Fine Arts degree. You can see where this is going..
Anyway..
So my friend advises me on what to wear (A&F has a thing, I knew that. Her advice was fully warranted). I show up, looking the part, as the piece I thought I knew. I was most likely awkward. I’ll admit. But even for my awkwardness I thought I was mostly charming. Though my sense of charm does not always match the main stream. Needless to say…
I was told I was not “girl next store” enough for this shitty post-college position I was lowering myself to consider. Funny how things work out. Is it not? Laugh or cry. That is the choice that I am sure will be repeated more often than I hope.
Isolation..
This is & what was, and will always be. Many choose it. I choose it. I hate it. I need it. I don’t know anything at all about how it REALLY feels. I am alone in my emotions; like the CIA is alone in their knowledge of the fucked up things that are most likely happening to American citizens without said citizen consent…anyway
It’s the only way I can describe selfish pride. Fuck, I’d give anything, if I were a good person, to not have that. Live Simply; Be Yourself. Blah Blah…right?

I wish I had a piranha, or five, to feed some rodents to…
Fuck

I want to be good…

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